How do you screw up a clone movie? You turn Edward Ashton’s Mickey7 novel into a feature-length film starring Robert Pattinson and call it Mickey 17. Coming from bona fide legend Bong Joon-ho in his first film since Parasite, Mickey 17 seemed like a sure-fire recipe for success. An introspective sci-fi black comedy with some of the industry’s biggest names attached? What could go wrong?
A whole lot. We haD the pleasure of seeing Mickey 17 before its theatrical debut and walked away from the experience confused. Not that Mickey 17’s story is hard to follow, despite the virtually infinite moral quandries the film sets up – before they were seemingly discarded on the cutting room floor. No, it was the choppy script, senseless editing, and over-the-top acting that make Mickey 17 ideal for home viewing.
Life imitates art… or something like that
Robert Pattinson stars as the unremarkable and titular Mickey Barnes, and more specifically, Mickey 17, in this futuristic sci-fi. Out of desperation to escape his problems back on Earth, Mickey signs up to become an ‘expendable’ during a years-long space mission alongside failed politician Kenneth Marshall (Mark Ruffalo) in an attempt to colonise an alien planet, Niflheim.
Expendables are, as the name suggests, expendable. Whenever Mickey dies on the job, his body is recycled and eventually reprinted, retaining most of his memories and personality – ready to die again. Rinse. Repeat. You get the idea. Mickey is employed to carry out the crew’s undesirable jobs like testing out experimental nerve gas or experiencing the effects of cosmic radiation on bare flesh.
Mickey 17 goes a long way to explain that, in this world, printing out another expendable before the last has died goes against the very laws of nature. You can see where this is going, right? It isn’t long before a fresh-faced Mickey 18 is spat out of the human printer (you best believe we didn’t come up with that McGuffin name) and comes face-to-face with Mickey 17, who survives his previous mission against all odds.
Having twice the Robert Pattinson on screen at once is about as good as Mickey 17 gets. It isn’t long before all manner of hijinks occur involving the two Mickeys and the overarching villains, Ken Marshall and his wife, played by the usually brilliant Toni Collette. Ruffalo’s ham-fisted and entirely on-the-nose portrayal of a Donald Trump/Elon Musk mash-up feels out of place and unlike Bong’s oftentimes nuanced political satires.
And that, perhaps, is Mickey 17’s biggest sin. Bong paves the way for a wholly more interesting story than we ever got, setting up multiple strands in the movie’s first act that go nowhere. Nonsensical decisions drive the story to an unsatisfying end that attempts to wrap up the lacklustre plot in a matter of minutes. Bong’s ideologies are prevalent throughout (maybe too much so) but miss that sense of style that Parasite effortlessly oozed.
Two Pattinsons are better than one
Were it not for Pattinson being completely dialed-in throughout the 2h17m runtime, we might have considered an even lower score than the one we settled on. The ex-Twilight actor has done a complete reversal of his image, now landing himself roles pretty much anywhere he’d like. Pattinson exudes a charisma and oddness that Mickey 17 specifically called for, and sticks the landing perfectly. The accent could use some work, however.
Arguably, the biggest issue with Pattinson’s character(s) is that we don’t see them nearly often enough, despite there being two of them. Him? Whatever the case, most of those valuable minutes are hogged by Mark Ruffalo, whose boisterous demeanour lacks conviction and saps the life out of every scene he’s in. The same goes for Toni Collette, who matches the energy of her counterpart a little too well for our liking.
Easily the best – alongside Pattinson – is Naomi Ackie’s character. Ackie fills the role of Nasha Barridge, a jack-of-all-trades law enforcer who is also entangled with Mickey and, later, two Mickeys. Her compelling acting chops are not lost among the stellar cast, regularly outperforming those around her. There are moments in the script that let Ackie down, but she softens the blow and rises to the occasion magnificently.
Try again
Where other movies might be lacking in terms of plot and writing, there’s usually something soulful in the score and some pretty visuals to latch onto. Even in the capable hands of cinematographer Darius Khondji, who helmed Se7en and Bong’s own Okja, couldn’t quite turn the icy Niflheim setting into a glorious vista. There are moments of brilliance early on, before the cookie-cutter grey hues and uninteresting set design take the lead.
Mickey 17’s score is equally forgettable. It’s never a good sign when we have to look up a film’s soundtrack the following day – not to add these songs to a personal playlist – but to remind ourselves what was even there. It’s not that Jung Jaeil’s excellent composition comprising a singular, haunting piano is bad. It guided us through writing this very review. But once you’ve heard one theme in Mickey 17, you’ve heard ’em all.
Mickey 17 verdict
Mickey 17 is a lot of things. Witless, meandering, and nonsensical are just a few of the words that jumped to mind. But the one thing it definitely doesn’t feel like is a Bong Joon-ho film, discarding the director’s typical MO in search of a Hollywood hit with some of its biggest faces at hand. From a weak plot that does away with its most interesting aspects within the first five minutes to a forgettable soundtrack, Mickey 17 isn’t worth the price of admission.
Mickey 17 opens in theatres this Friday, 07 March
